Every day, I talk to women in the grocery store, at my kids' school, birthday parties, doctors offices and online. These women share their real stories of motherhood and struggles. They have courageously shed their capes and dropped their masks. They say, “I was suffering during pregnancy and after the birth of my baby. I felt alone.” They had difficult pregnancies, births, trouble breastfeeding, anxiety, depression, bumpy relationships with their spouse or partner, adjusting to staying at home, working full-time and the fulfilling but, rocky road to motherhood.
These women are brave leaders; standing up and saying this road is difficult. Motherhood is confusing and the role more complicated than ever before. Mom’s and expectant mothers are supposed to be all things: homemaker extraordinaire, enthusiastic lover who wears nothing but Victoria Secret, provider who works full-time in the corporate world and “Super Mom.” Whether or not you agree with Sheryl Sandberg and her book “Lean In,” it doesn't matter. What does matter is that women need to support one another; allowing us to be real and mother's who can have it all.
3 Reasons to “Lean In”
1. Who are we? Women are in danger of losing themselves as they fulfill their roles and care for all but themselves! These expectations are unrealistic and can’t be reached. Why do we think we can reach them without real Super Hero Powers? There has not been another time in history where there were so many roles and expectations of women. Many of our mothers and grandmothers did one thing and did it well. The women that have gone before us have paved the way for our future. We now have more power, choice, influence and the ability to lead. Why is it that mothers remain isolated in their struggle to cope with all the subtitles that go with being a woman today? Lean in tell it like it is!
2. Women Unite: Why are we not using our power, choice, influence and leadership to unite, ” Lean in” and support each other? Why are we not saying, “ it’s “ok” to struggle. It’s “ok” to ask for help. It’s “ok” not to be perfect and you can’t do it all”? There is a saying “Don’t judge me unless you are perfect”. Women judge each other and are often the toughest critics. Why are we scared to admit we don’t bake, that we pluck our eyebrows in the car, that we give our toddlers fries, don’t always buy organic, buy new underwear for our kids because we don’t have time to do the wash, work on our laptops while with our kids, and lock ourselves in the bathroom to just get a moments peace.
3. Be a Leader , “Lean In”. Share your real story…… Tell it like it is! You could make a huge difference in struggling mother’s life, her emotional wellness and understanding that “You can’t do it all”. Many women suffer in silence and won’t reach out for help. Let’s join our voices and support each other, one mother to another. A women’s and mother’s emotional wellness is important. Share with a Mom the gift of “Mommy Me” time. She needs to look after herself so she can look after her baby, children, husband, job and household. It doesn't work any other way. It's not selfish. Let her know that she shouldn't feel guilty…. because it's a deposit in the mommy coping account. There is nothing like being a mom and helping a mom enjoy this experience with support and real understanding.