I am lucky in that I have some very good friends who have helped me to stay focussed and upbeat during times of unhappiness and it's nice to be able to return the favour! One of my friends is feeling quite down at the moment and so we were texting each other last night and she was saying she felt this anger and resentment towards her ex husband – it's that feeling you get after a long term relationship ends. As painful as it may be the only way to deal with it is to confront the issue and really work through what has upset you, with that comes frustration because you may have felt a lack of control during the relationship, and disappointment because the relationship failed to deliver your expectations and then there's fear! Fear for the future, who will you depend on now? Will you ever meet that special someone? How will you cope with the loneliness? Each negative thought needs to be worked through so that you can put everything into perspective. Also you need to consider the positives and be thankful for what you do have – easier said then done I know, particularly when you are feeling quite bleak about everything and it does involve a lot of rational thinking. Also talk to your really good friends, you know the ones you can trust that are not judgemental.
Consider your current situation, what can be done to improve things a little? What's obtainable? Even the odd night out with a group of friends will lift your spirits considerably! Would a change of career or job help? As time progresses you will become more savvy and realise whatever happened in the past happened for a reason and as a result you are now stronger, wiser and independant! However don't expect this to be an overnight process! It took me several years to develop my positive thinking so that I now truly feel in control of my life.