I had one of those momentous “Oh my god, my life isn’t working for me right now” moments this week and it freaked me out so much, that I genuinely thought I was going to have a panic attack. My heart was racing, my head was spinning and I was too scared to open my eyes to see where everything was going to land.
All I could think of was “oh shit!”
Now I am not a control freak, but with so many balls in the air at one time, one can’t help but be organised. If I was disorganised I would run the risk of dropping one of those balls and have it hurtle toward the ground with break neck speed and an almighty crash.
Would anyone be hurt? Not a chance.
Would anyone hate me? Highly unlikely.
Would my pride be hurt? You bet it would be.
Why? Because sometimes I lose sight of the balance in my life and trick myself into believing that I am beyond Super Women and can therefore do anything and everything and all at once!
So with a resounding jolt, I found myself forced back to reality and in a position where the only way forward was to do what I call the “core review”. A self -assessment of where I had landed, what had brought me to that point and what I needed to do to get back on track.
The first thing that struck me was that I was spending so much time helping others to work on their own lives, that my own life was suffering. I wasn’t putting any time into maintaining or moving my life forward.
I was putting everyone else’s needs before my own: I wasn’t taking any time out to just be me. My hobby was everyone else.
I wasn’t eating right, exercising right or sleeping right.
I wasn’t taking any action toward my goals, I was working in a space that I wasn’t enjoying and I was surrounded by some incredibly toxic people.
I was worrying about things that may never happen. I was letting myself lose focus on what I wanted in life and doing exactly what I teach people not to do – focusing my mind to the things that I didn’t have in life.
I was stuck in a “lack of” cycle that was firmly switched to auto-pilot.
So what did I do? I started again…I sat down and stripped every teeny, tiny part of my life back to its most basic form.
Was I spending quality time with those I cherished most? No
Did I love my work? Yes
Was I making a difference? Not as much as I could be
Could I use my time better? MUCH better
Was I living my passion? Not really
Was I taking my husband for granted? Way too much
Was my life balanced? Not even close
Did I have my finances structured in the best way? Turns out not so much
Did I leap out of bed each day knowing that I was living my purpose? Not like I should have been
So here’s the thing, it doesn’t matter where your happy place is or what it looks like, the thing to remember is this ~ your happy place isn’t a destination, it’s a work in progress, one that evolves as things change around you.
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