Have you ever been the brunt of people’s uncalled-for criticism? You may be getting on with life, building your business and then someone you know and love says something demotivating to you?
You know they mean well, but it still hurts.
They might even think they are helping you out but it still hurts.
And if you are anything like most of the women I know, including myself, there is an internal fear of rocking the boat. We want people to like us. We are created for community and it seems scary when people we love do not understand why we do what we do.
You might start to question yourself and wonder why you bother trying when the people in your life do not even get it or even appreciate all the efforts you are putting in.
You might even start to consider yourself far too proud.
And with all these thoughts and feelings going on inside, is it any surprise that you put an invisible ceiling on how much you are allowed to make?
Starting your own business can be exciting, exhilarating and scary all at the same time. You might have started off sharing excitedly with everyone in your life about what you are up to and then you started to get the feeling that they were not as excited about it as you were and so you start to shut down and your inner loyalty kicks in and so you put the brakes on.
You may not even be aware that you are doing this but you are trying to be liked by people who do not want you to upset the status quo.
How can you overcome this fear of criticism?
- You must recognize that it is there Firstly, recognize that the fear is there. You cannot fix something you are not even aware of. Take a moment as you read this to ask yourself internally, am I holding back because the people in my life may not like me if I really show up powerfully?
- Choose to forgive If you do note that there has been a lack-lustre reaction to your exciting business news, choose to forgive them because they are just feeling a little left out of your life and maybe, they are slightly envious that you are getting on and creating something new. It does not mean you have to change anything, it just means that you release them from the expectation that they have to like what you are up to.
- Forgive yourself When I discovered that I was holding myself back as a result of my family’s expectations of me, I felt devastated that I had allowed myself to waste so much time trying to get the approval of people who would never quite understand what was going on with me. I had to choose to forgive myself and recognize that I did the best I knew to do with the information I had. You must love your journey to this moment and recognize too that when you know better, you do better.
- Find a new group of people to be around This does not mean you quit all your old relationships. You know you need community that gets you and supports you. It may start with a mentoring or coaching relationship or a mastermind group.It is important enough that you must pay for it so that you start to hang around people who are also going forward. This has 2 fold benefits – 1 – you have new friends and 2 – you start to think that anything is possible. When you hand around people doing what you want to do, it all starts to look more possible. You cannot expect to have 5 or more figure months if you hang around people who think and act in a ‘4 or less figure’ month way.
- Get very deliberateI always say ‘Live life Deliberately’ because you must get clear on what you want and deliberately do whatever it takes to create it. Nothing drops into your lap, you have to create it. And you cannot create if you live passively. Get deliberate about following the steps above and see the difference it makes to your income.
If you would like more information on being a successful entrepreneur, pop over and register for a free copy of my marketing blueprint. Rosemary Nonny Knight was a pharmacist who decided to quit and become free & wealthy her way– She now teaches other to do the same.
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