Two words that can mean so much. In a society where beauty is defined by looks, most of us women who don't look like what we see on TV find ourselves constantly repeating those two words. Growing up a busty, over developed, curvy Latina was never easy. At just twelve years old, and one year after hitting puberty, my mother took me to a nutritionist before my weight spiraled out of control. I managed to lose 14lbs the summer before 8th grade, and in high school maintained a decent weight. My breasts though.. that's a completely different story. It wasn't until college, of course, that my weight began to go up. It seemed like every time I went to the doctor the scale kept going up. I remember with every few pounds I gained, I'd set a limit. “I won't gain more than 5 pounds.” And that was pretty much the story for the next five years.
When I graduated college two years ago, I was 60lbs more than I was upon entering college. Unfortunately, the industry I chose to be in is one that is mostly about looks. I'm a pretty girl, but at the end of the day I do not fit the bill. This is something that I am reminded of very often. If I want to get noticed I need to lose a few pounds. I have a nice shape and I know how to present myself well. I don't think I'm “sloppy” with my weight. In reality, not many people around me notice the weight gain. I do.
So when VH1 started to promote their new show The Gossip Game I was excited. I was excited because this show was going to be following women in the industry I hope to one day be a part of. I was looking forward to watching their individual stories to see how they have become successful. To my surprise, the first thing I noticed was that most of these women looked like me! It wasn't until then that I realized how we are surrounded by images of women who many of us out here can not physically relate to.
It was refreshing to see that there are women out there who are successful and are beautiful without being gym freaks, models, or petite. Joseline Hernandez from Love and Hip Hop: Atlanta was recently interviewed by K.Foxx who is one of the women on The Gossip Game. Joseline made the following statement, “They all sloppy,” in reference to The Gossip Game's cast, except for K.Foxx.” And just nasty. Get they @ass in the gym.” When I think of the women of this show, in terms of appearance, the last thing that comes to my mind is “sloppy.” So I was pretty offended, especially because I was able to see myself in these women. Does that make me sloppy too?
Last night during my radio show, I had the privilege of interviewing Kim Osorio from The Gossip Game, who is one of the women who looks like me. I brought up Joseline's comment, and Kim was open to discussing it. “Sloppy can be defined by the way you look, the way you speak, or the way you act on TV.” Kim also explained how real women come in different sizes and the show is a reflection of that. “We're all a work in progress. Just to be able to have a spot on TV looking like a real person is a statement for us, and we should support that rather than be so critical of that statement.” She also expressed how women should be applauded instead of being knocked down. I do believe that we should continue to bring more light to this subject since it is a reality and so relevant to women everywhere. I am very thankful to have had that conversation with Kim who provided a little bit more insight, especially being a woman in the crazy media world. Funny enough, just a few minutes talking to her was able to give me a little bit of a self esteem boost.
As women we must all learn to support one another instead of knocking each other down.
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”
– Click on the link below to watch the interview with Kim & let me know what your definition of beauty is