Dear Social Media: Where the hell is my R-O-I??!!

social media certif

Dear Social Media,

I wanted to talk to you in person but it’s been too hard to nail you down. You seem to be all over the place. Sometimes your head is in the cloud (s). So instead, I decided to write this post.

To be honest, I am pretty damn disgusted with the time I’ve spent with you.

Yes, I have made wonderful connections with truly smart and good-hearted people throughout the world. You have brought knowledge and information to me that I never dreamed I would need— or want.

I’ve even been OK with the occasional auto responder DM I get on Twitter. If only someone would develop an app to stop this incessant spam and junk mail about Viagra, weight loss, and inheritances. I don’t have a penis, I’m perimenopausal, and the inheritance was spent in the 1990s.

But the real reason I am posting this is that I must know: When will I start seeing some R-O-I on my social media activities? I’m chatting, tweeting and Facebooking. I post videos. I have a book. I’m working my rear-end off.

It’s been six months of this ‘free’ strategy stuff.  People are retweeting me, commenting on my blog, and becoming fans. But my Paypal and Shopping Cart are covered with cobwebs. I’ve barely made a plug nickel from all of this building trust and branding crap.

What gives, my friend? When do you step in and start showing me this is a two-way relationship?


Dear @SueYoungMedia,

I’m glad you got this out in the open. I’m all about communication. How long does it take someone to make a best friend? I bet it’s more than a few conversations.  You don’t keep track of the time you’ve invested in this friend. One day you may just realize that this person is your BFF.

How did it happen? Time. Patience. Trust. Comfort. Respect. Common interests.

How long will it take?

Put away the stop watch. Rip up the calendar page. If you’re super focused on the dust bunnies in your PayPal account, our friendship may need a break.

I don’t want to leave you high and dry, but if you are hell-bent on selling stuff, pay for an ad.

Right channel. Wrong pew.



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