Farewell to the Family Bed

We upgraded to our king-size bed over 13 years ago when our son Noah was 1 week old, when we discovered that he would not sleep anywhere on his own. Not only was it an unexpected introduction to attachment parenting, it was also an act of self-preservation in a hopeful attempt that we might get a bit more sleep if we purchased a bed that had room for all three of us. Hopeful was the operative word, because Noah’s preferred bed during his infancy into his early toddler years was to sleep on my husband Joel. And once I returned to work at my company’s office after my 8-week maternity leave, as a family we prioritized my need for sleep first, as Joel worked from our home and could theoretically catch a nap during the day. (That never happened, as Noah was nap-averse.) Joel and Noah would alternate between the bed and the couch, depending on how deeply they both were sleeping any given night.   Given the diminutive size of the master bedroom in our pre-war Cape Cod house, a king-size bed was and is a bit of stretch. (As you can see from the picture below, the mattress almost fills the entire space of our alleged and even more diminutive dining room.)   However, that family bed for more than 13 years has been a haven for our family. When Noah was an older toddler, his favorite place to sleep was in that bed in between Joel and me, when he did finally surrender to sleep. Periodically, when Noah would sleep in his own bed, it was a welcome and appreciated reminder that it was also a marriage bed. It was a (forbidden) indoor trampoline for Noah – one memorable night, I fell asleep early from sheer exhaustion, only to be awakened by Noah jumping on the bed (carefully, so he would not jump on me) – he had also turned on the lights and the t.v. for his amusement. It was also a comfort zone for Noah, where we held him as he suffered from the (thankfully!) rare stomachache or earache. And it’s where I convalesced from my outpatient lumpectomy, going on 7 warrior-years ago.   Recently, no amount of turning or flipping extended the life of our family bed, and I’ve woken up more than once in the last few months with a backache from the worn-out mattress. Just before the new year, we purchased a replacement king-size bed (while it fills most of our master bedroom, as Joel at over 6 feet prefers that size) just for Joel and me – Noah, approaching Joel’s height and in the throes of adolescence, no longer needs (or wants) a family bed – thankfully! Our new bed arrived today, and we bid a fond farewell to the family bed.   2015-01-07 08.08.53       What are your current stories (or memories) of your family bed? Corey and I always love to hear your stories, here and in the collective social media channels of the Capital Region [email protected] community:   http://blog.timesunion.com/momsatwork/   @CoreyJamisonLLC   @debmbest   Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/capregionwomenatwork   Twitter: @CRWomenAtWork   Join the LinkedIn Group: Capital Region [email protected]   Website: CapRegionWomenatWork.com

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