Loosen Up to Find Success

Group Of Friends Eating OutdoorsI think that a huge mistake that a lot of people make in social situations is that they make everything too much of a big deal.  They take things so seriously that there is no possible way that they can relax and be themselves.

Here are some Do’s and Don’t about being casual in some specific social situations:

DO: Be casual and unemotional about asking for a phone number.   Be comfortable.  Be willing to give your opinion or disagree.

DON’T: Get so excited when you are talking to your date that you raise the pitch in your voice or talk too fast.  Text nonstop.  Answer every phone call and text from your girlfriend or boyfriend as soon as possible. Over-compliment.  Kiss up.  Helicopter.

Job Interviews
DO: Casually tell them your salary expectation (at the appropriate time, of course). Be honest. Smile.

DON’T: Beg and plead for the job.  Kiss up.  Over-compliment.  Interrupt.

Party/Social Gathering
DO:  Move around.  Talk to a lot of people.  Smile. Act like you belong. Make appropriate eye contact.

DON’T:  Talk to one person for too long.  Try to impress people.  Worry about what people think of you.  Drink heavily. Sit in the corner by yourself.

Public Speaking
DO: Be relaxed.  Have a little swagger. Change your talking speed. Make eye contact with the audience.

DON’T: Talk too fast.  Use too many phrases like “um”, “I mean”, “you know”, etc. too much.  Look down/avoid eye contact or touch your face excessively.  Be unprepared.

Note: Being casual does not mean being rude, unprofessional, disrespectful, etc.  Being casual just means being relaxed and being yourself.  Be careful to not forget the difference. 

Good luck!

*Follow me on Twitter @TheMingleMaster

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