One of the most common phrases that comes up when I’m coaching people is “I just can’t”. I just can’t lose the weight. I just can’t leave my marriage. I just can’t get my business to the next level and so on.
Unfortunately, when we start a sentence with “I just can’t…” it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
Underneath this overused statement is an internal belief system. It is a way of being, a mantra that falls into the “glass half empty” world.
This is not to say that there are truly things that we can’t do. Of course there are but as mankind advances those things become fewer and far between. With men becoming women, women becoming men, stem cells growing new hearts and phones being able to recharge themselves through the ether; the idea of not being able to do what we want is flirting with extinction.
These are exciting times. A single person from their living room can create a network of friends, compete at a game, get a toned body and build a business. A thrilling point indeed knowing that we have the capability to design our entire life from home, on our own. If we can do that, just imagine what the possibilities are when we walk out our front door.
Possibility is what drives forward motion. As long as we believe that our goals, dreams and ambitions are possible we carry on with optimism and conviction. I pity those who get in the way of someone who has these two qualities in their arsenal.
Be aware of every time you start a sentence with, “I just can’t”. Take notice of what behavior follows. Are you defeating yourself? My challenge to you is to turn the “I just can’t” into “I can”. Focus on what you can do and you’ll find that the “can’t”s diminish in size and importance. Your behavior will begin to make the turn around the corner towards possibility and success.
What CAN you do? When will you start doing it?
Caird Urquhart is Founder and President of Newroad Coaching, a boutique coaching firm providing one-on-one personal and business coaching services and also author of 30 Ways To Better Days: How to Rally After You’ve Been Dumped. Find Newroad Coaching on their blog and on Twitter and YouTube.